A bit of back story; I came down with a lovely bronchitis/laryngitis combo a few days ago, which turned smoking into barf-inducing hack-fest. I took advantage of this and quit smoking.
I’ve been making feeble and futile attemtpts since New Years 2012. And I do pretty well. Until the mind games start. Then I’m fucked.
Its the strangest thing in the world. I’m 100% comitted to quitting, but its almost like I talk myself into failure. Like this separate chain smoker entity convinces me that “one puff won’t hurt.” Or that “I can smoke tonight and quit again tommorrow”. And so on and so forth until I find myself smoking a pack a day again.
Today is the third day since I’ve quit smoking. And holy shit, am I ever trying to convince myself to go out and buy a pack.
Seriously brain. Wtf?